I hate bad days, when I just want to go flip at everyone I see and make people mad and all that, and the days where I want to just say, 'fuck everything'. They make me do things I wouldn't normally do, but they also make me care less about things and the people I do care about. And more often then not, I end up doing something I'll regret later, knowing that I'll regret it later, but I tell myself ' you have to do it now because you won't regret it now - you'll just regret it later, and you'll be weaker then. you have to do it when you're strong '. I thought I'd learned that lesson for the final time, but apparently not. To me, the lesson isn't that lesson when I'm in that situation - it just doesn't come to mind. And then, as I said, I find myself sitting there, regretting what I did and feeling bad about it, and thinking that I might just be able to undo it, but then things won't be the same anyway.